sadly ...

The guy that I'm trying so hard to be with and well am with actually, is going to be going to college this summer and will not be able to see me as much . Well, actually, I think that he won't be able to see me at all.

We talked about it a couple nights ago. We were laying down and he mentioned the fact that he will be taking classes soon and I didn't know what to say to him. I just laid there really quiet trying to act like it didn't matter to me. He said he feels bad that he will have to ignore me for a while, because of his studies and I had to say "I understand" because well, I do. He's going to school and school is more important than our relationship. I know that and I accept it. I would never want to come between him and his studies, that would make me a bad person and I care about him too much to be in the way.

It sucks, because, I finally find the person that actually is perfect for me. He cares about me, he isn't needy, he acts like a man, but he's sensitive, he makes me feel good, and he always thinks about us, before just himself. I love that about him, but I found him and now I have to let him go. I guess, this is where the "If it is meant to be yours, it will come back to you" phrase comes in. The thing is , I don't think that I will ever be able to let him go. It just hurts too much.

During the conversation, I didn't say anything, I just tried to act like it didn't mean anything to me, like the whole thing was just another fling and I felt so bad about that. When he left, I thought to myself, "You idiot!" you should have told him how you feel! ...

But I didn't .. and now I don't know what I'm going to do...

Why do parents think that they know everything? /vegetarian

ok . I'm really buggin' out. My mother, as always, has to be the boss of everything, including my driving. I know parents always nag about stuff like this, but it's just so annoying. Every move i made was wrong, and when I ended up being stiff, because of all of the criticism, there was a complaint to that to. *sigh* I was ready to just give them the keys and say you guys can drive. I'm turning in my drivers license. I'm done. But I prayed for patience, although I was cussing in my head. haha. Still, it was just criticism after criticism after criticism and when I opened my mouth to say something, I was wrong.

My mother:

"Don't say anything anymore. Just accept your wrong."

"Why are you so stubborn?"

"Look at where you are going?"

"Why is your music so loud?"

"Why are you going at the same rate as the speed limit? You already passed the test, no one is judging you." *pssh*

"Why is your music down now? I said it was loud. turn it back on."

... you get where this is going...

anyway ...

after this I was just like:

*silence*

*straight face*

*stiff*

OK . On another note. I think I'm going to cut down on my eating of meat. It's just very I don't know. Meat just makes me so full and I feel a little weird eating too much of it. I'm not stopping eating meat, I'm just cutting down. I feel like there is so much more better food out there for me to eat and meat is not that healthy anyway. (well the kind of meat my family eats. FILIPINOS) I don't know . guess I'll have to debate this all haha

Obsessed... the movie was bomb

Ohk .. Well this movie was so bomb. Beyonce was on top, as always, haha . She did amazing in this movie. I just got back from watchin' it with my friends. My friend is going to back to Korea =/ .. and I decided to take her out . But I loved this movie so much plus Idris Elba is HOT! Ya'll should already know that i love my chocolate haha .. but yeah .. anyway ... There was so much going on and damn , I must say this is one of my favorite movies. Right next to American Gangsta, haha .. and the fight at the end between Ali Larter and Beyonce, it was great haha. I love my girl fights, and I loved this one. Beyonce could do some damage. It was pretty damn crazy and intense. I just want anyone who reads to know that this movie is worth watching . MOST DEFINITELY. The acting was good, the story was good, finally it is not a black woman that is crazy lol . To me, the story started out a little slow, but it is worth the tiny 5 minute wait haha .

Wow I just sounded like moviefone. haha . but that movie was so good it was worth the good review.

I got a new camera!

Ok .. well .. the camera isn't really .. "new" . It is just new for me . haha ... I passed my driver's test, so I now have my license! ye~ah . *happyface* So because of all of that, my mother bought me a camera! Not the regular kind (digital), she bought me a cannon 350 or rebel 200 . It's kind of old, but i like it. I'm taking intense pictures with it ha~ha and annoying everyone, but hey , at least I'm putting the camera to good use right? Well, anyway, I'm planning on taking a lot of pictures, so watch out everyone. If your in the way of the camera, you will get shot (your picture taken). He~he. 

New pictures will be uploaded in a little bit. XD